That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
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