i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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