I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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