I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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