"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Your dad touched me again.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
