Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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