Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
