I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
handjob tips. give me some.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
