Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
