She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
