Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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