i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize