he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
