You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
The struggles of a small town man whore
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
