Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
