i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
