did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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