Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
