you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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