lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
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