so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Randomize
