Hey man sorry I got all grabby
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
