so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
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