I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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