Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
