one word: firstdatebathroomanal
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Randomize
