He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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