Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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