I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
