My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize