You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
