His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
