Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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