i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
