Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
