Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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