i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
