Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize