this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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