why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Just cropdusted the office
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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