your parents love me but you hate me
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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