White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Randomize
