found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize