i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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