I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
