I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I wish i was in the wii world.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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