This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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