i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
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