At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
