And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
