she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize