I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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