it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
